Thirst

Wash over me like a tidal wave

Clean out what pulls me to the grave

Nothing left that you don't love

Take me where your river flows

Heal the desert in my soul

Let it wash over my feet

All I'm asking for is just a drink

I thirst for you

These are some of the lyrics to Phil Wickham's new song, Thirst. I cannot get enough of it. The song itself is beautiful, but the lyrics grabbed my heart tonight. I was driving home and just let this song repeat. I am so desperate. I am desperate to be healed from my doubt. My soul feels like a desert, and the only thing that can heal it is God. God why aren't you healing my soul? All I'm asking for is just a drink. I need just a drink. Just give me a taste of faith, of hope, of belief. When I'm surrounded by a fog of doubt, grab my heart God! Just do something! Please! 

I try to just "be" and let you do your work. I try to continue to pray, knowing that suffering always produces growth and faith. But I feel like I'm reverting. I feel my faith slipping. I don't want that. I'm begging you God, let me not pray these things in vain. 

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These are my prayers. I could use some of your prayers too. I'm not hopeless, but I am just incredibly doubtful and cynical. 

Just keeping it real.

- Bethany